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Funny/Witty Football Chants

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by RedPaddy, Feb 2, 2010.

  1. RedPaddy

    RedPaddy
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    have many of you out there got funny or witty football chants to share & give us all a chuckle ??

    I'll start the ''ball rolling'':D

    i know the first one is about our own Fernando, but it gave me a right laugh:D

    This is a brilliant take on this chant by Liverpool fans:
    (we all know this part!!)

    His armband proved he was a red
    Torres, Torres
    'You'll never walk alone', it said
    Torres, Torres
    We bought the lad from sunny Spain
    He gets the ball, he scores again
    Fer-nan-do Torres, Liverpool's number nine!


    In response to that sung to Liverpool Fans:

    He's half a girl, he's half a boy
    Torres, Torres
    He looks just like a tranvestite
    Torres, Torres,
    He wears a frock he loves the c.ock,
    he sells his arse on Albert Dock,
    Fer-nan-do Torres,
    Carragher's bit on the side




    West Ham chant not 'We've got Di Canio. You've got f**k allio.'


    West Ham chant to Liverpool fans "We've got Di Canio, you've got our stereos"


    West Ham fans came out with after Van Persie's arrest in Holland. To the tune of rewind by the artful dodger:
    Van-Per-sie when the girl says no molest her.


    Liverpool fans to Evertons Duncan Ferguson, because of bans & regular injury:

    Big Duncan Ferguson,
    in for a week,
    out for a month, Big Dunc is a tampon



    Norwich fans to Deliah Smith after her drunken outburst:

    Why Why WHY Deliah
    Why Why Why?



    Notts County fans to Norwich fans:

    to the tune of The Addams Family:

    Your father is your brother
    Your sister is your mother
    You like to shag each other
    The Norwich family



    Celtic fans " We've got more Englishmen than you" Testimony to the fact that Arsenal had no British players on the park at anytime & Celtic palyed the whole game with Danny Fox at Left back!


    I think it might have been Charlton to MCFC to the tune of "Cheer up sleepy jean":
    Cheer up Francis Lee,
    Oh what can it mean, to be a
    Fat Northern *******, with a
    Shit Football Team



    sung by various London/Southern teams in response to what was sung at them by the Newcastle supporters

    " Speak faakin English , we only speak faakin' English".


    Celtic & Motherwell fans chant to Andy Goram when he was diagnosed with schizophrenia.

    There’s only 2 Andy Goram’s
    2 Andy Goram’s
    There’s only 2 Andy Goram’s
     
  2. Dublin Red

    Dublin Red
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    Tim Howard diagnosed with mild tourettes and Everton fans (I think) singing...

    Tim Timiny, Tim Timiny, Tim Tim teroo
    We've got Tim Howard and he says **** you!

    The celtic song for Nakamura..

    One Nakamura, one Nakamura
    He eats chow mein
    And votes Sinn Fein
    Walkin in a Naka wonderland..
     
  3. RedRay1

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  4. bobby benitez

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    There is a clip on YouTube of rangers fans singing "Nakamura ate my dog" about 2 seconds before he stuck a 40 yarder into the top corner.
     
  5. D7Hooper

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    Galway Utd played Rovers in tolka a few seasons back during a certain crisis in the western city and their away support were greeted with;

    "Here for the water,
    your only here for the water,
    Here for the waaater,
    your only here for the water".

    Still love singing the 'Roy Keane is a traitor' song to the langers or the alternate Liam Coyle is a traitor version to the har de hars.
     
  6. Bren100

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    Cork City fan to ex player Ollie Cahill


    Ollie Cahill, shags his mother
    and his sister and his brother
    they all like to shag each other
    they'reee allllll .. f**ked up!
     
  7. F@ces

    F@ces
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    Fulham fans last season, sang to Frank Sinatra's "That's Amore":

    "When you're sat in row Z, and the ball hits your head, that's Zamora."

    Or fans when they heard Andy Goram was a schizophrenic:

    "Two Andy Gorams, there's only two Andy Gorams!"
     
  8. Podgecheco

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    The kop Singing "Ya should have stayed on the tele" to Alan Shearer last season was classic he even laughed
     
  9. rev

    rev
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    Still brings a smile to my face :D
     
  10. fermoyred80

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    and in fairness Shearer did laugh and wave to the Kop even when they were losing
     
  11. robbie st leger

    robbie st leger
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    when kanu had his heart operation the gooner fans used to sing

    he's big - he's black - he's had a heart attack - he's kanu he's kanu :D
     
  12. SUPERFAN

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    a favouite of mine is
    "oh adebayor,
    oh adebayo-o-or,
    his da washes elephants,
    and his ma is a whore."

    the west hm fans sang this one to harry redknapp a few weeks ago..
    "twitch in a minute,
    he's going to twitch in a minute,
    twitch in a minute......":D

    this one is taken from the book redmen,a season on the drink.there was a particularly fat female citeh fan giving it loads to the lpool fans when citeh were 2-0 up last season.cue the lpool fans to said citeh fan when they turned it around...
    "too soon,you started bingeing too soon."
    absolute kwality.:D
     
  13. welshy1

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    heard this today, what city fans are singin to the scum

    U.N.I.T.E.D
    That spells ****in debt to me
    With a knick knack paddy whack, give a dog a bone
    Ocean Finance on the phone!!


    hahahha, if only we were in a position to chant that at them!!
     
  14. midg23

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    I swear i cried with laughter when i read this one
     
  15. F@ces

    F@ces
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    It was my favourite from last year. Super!
     
  16. RedPaddy

    RedPaddy
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  17. red_shamrock

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    Song from City fans before Tevez signed:

    He's neck scars proves he's lost his head Tevez, Tevez
    He'll never have a sexy bird Tevez, Tevez
    The argy twat, the ugly ****, they sewn his head on back to front
    Carlos Tevez, herman munster head.

    Song after he signed:

    Verse 1
    He used to be a dirty red Tevez Tevez
    But now he is a blue instead Tevez Tevez
    We know that you’ve sh*gged loads of birds
    So now we’ve changed the f*ckin words
    Carlos Tevez, fitter than Cheryl Cole

    Verse 2
    The reds can’t buy him cos they’re skint Tevez Tevez
    But we are worth a f*cking mint Tevez Tevez
    United fans don’t think its fair
    But we’ve got Tevez we don’t care
    Carlos Tevez, Welcome to Manchester
     
  18. RedPaddy

    RedPaddy
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    :D:D
     
  19. fermoyred80

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    I thought the West Ham to chelsea one was good,

    Chelsea, chelsea wherever you may be, youd better keep your wife away from John Terry
     
  20. Niall

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    Even better straight after the whole KOP belting out the tune to MOTD:D:D:D:D
     

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